Thursday, September 13, 2012

I Don't Ever Want To Let You Down

     The title of this post was taken from the song It's Time by Imagine Dragons.

     Mason has a Social Studies project due tomorrow. I'll be honest I'm pretty nervous about this one. He come home with a small piece of green construction paper and the directions attached are as follows "On the paper provided, create a timeline of your life from birth until present day. You are welcome to use photographs or drawn pictures illustrating the stages of your life. Each student will get a chance to share his timeline with the class and a social studies grade will be given for the completion of this assignment. Timelines will be returned after a brief display period in our hall." First let me say that I love his teacher and he has adapted well to being in a new school. I REALLY REALLY like his teacher and she knows about the challenges we have faced this last year. However, this does not make this project any easier. A zillion questions began flooding my mind. Will he mention his dad? Will he want to talk about his dad dying? What will he say to his classmates when they ask about it? Will this upset him? Is he going to cry? Maybe I should just let him pick a few random things to put down, but then am I teaching him to avoid the topic? I can't imagine other parents giving this as much thought as I feel I need to, and honestly it makes me really angry. I'm not angry with the assignment, I'm angry with the hand I've been dealt. I'm anger that not only do I have to continue to live with this, but the kids have to as well. I'm angry when I see the hurt and pain on their faces when someone asks them a question about their family. When someone asks if John is their dad they struggle with how to answer that. All of this makes my stomach knot up and I feel like I'm going to throw up! I could however be overreacting and maybe Mason will be fine with all of this. I've put this project off till the last minute so we shall see I guess.


Unknown said...

Hope you are doing well!

Melanie said...

I am. Thanks for checking in. I just haven't felt like writing lately, however your comment has inspired me to make a short post and then try to keep up with things again. Hope things are well with you!